OBTAINING FORGIVENESS AND FORGIVING OTHERS—Salvation requires this
By Phil Shapley (White Wolf)
Introduction
Obtaining Salvation and Being Saved requires that your sins be forgiven-- if not, you pay the difficult penalty attached to them. When they are forgiven, you can continue to progress in knowledge, love, beauty……
This article deals with forgiveness at two levels;
Level 1—An overview of forgiveness;
Level 2—Disobedience of the Great Commandments and forgiving others.
An overview of forgiveness
Forgiveness defined
To forgive is a divine attribute. It is to pardon or excuse someone from blame for an offense or misdeed. The scriptures refer to forgiveness in two ways. The Lord commands us to repent of our sins and seek His forgiveness. He also commands us to forgive those who offend or hurt us.
Seeking forgiveness from the Lord
Sin is a heavy burden. It brings the tenseness of guilt and the anguish of knowing that we have acted against the will of our loving God. It brings lingering remorse as we realize that because of our actions, we may have hurt others and prevented ourselves from receiving blessings the Lord has been ready to give us.
Because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ, we can receive forgiveness for our misdeeds through sincere and complete repentance. Sinfulness brings suffering and pain, the Lord’s forgiveness brings relief, comfort and joy.
There are many reassuring scriptural references:
- “Behold, he who has repented of his sins, the same is forgiven, and I, the Lord, remember them no more (Latter Day Saint (LDS) Doctrine and Covenants (D & C) 58: 42).
- “Though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool” (Isaiah 1: 18).
We can experience this miracle, whether we need to repent of serious sins or day-to-day weaknesses. Just as Christ pleaded with people anciently, He pleads with us today.
“Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” “My yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11: 28, 30). “Behold, mine arm of mercy is extended towards you” (Book of Mormon (B of M) 3 Nephi 9:14).
Obtaining forgiveness of your sins
There are four steps for obtaining forgiveness. First, we must recognize and acknowledge our trespasses. Second, we confess our sin to the Lord and ask for forgiveness. If it is a serious sin, you may need to counsel with a spiritually wise person. Third, we forsake our sin, that is, we abandon the behavior. To do this, we often need the Lord’s help. To get it, we need to ask for it. If we sin again, we need to repeat the above 3 steps. And finally, if we have hurt others, we need to apologize to the offended persons, and where possible, make restitution.
Forgiving others
In addition to seeking the forgiveness for our own sins, we must be willing to forgive others even when they have hurt us. Christ said: “Ye ought to forgive one another; for he that forgiveth not his brother his trespasses standeth condemned before the Lord; for there remaineth in him the greater sin. I, the Lord, will forgive whom I will forgive, but of you it is required to forgive all men” (D & C 64: 9-10).
In life we have been wronged by other people, either innocently or intentionally. We can become angry, resentful, even vengeful. But this is not the Lord’s way. Christ counseled: “Love your enemies, bless them that curse you., do good to them that hate you, and pray for them that despitefully use you, and persecute you” (Matthew 5: 44). We will deal more with this in the next section.
Disobedience of the Great Commandments and forgiveness of others
The Problem
When a person doesn’t or can’t practice the Second Great Commandment—“Love thy neighbor as thyself” (Matthew 22: 39)— problems arise regarding forgiveness of others. When you don’t love yourself, it is hard to love others enough to forgive them. Further, additional problems frequently arise. Often one suffers from low self-esteem, feels insecure. This can lead a person to misinterpret matters and/or he is easily offended. As a result, one can find it hard to accept others, to work with them or cooperate, and increases the difficulty of forgiving. Some become vengeful, many gossip.
People with low self-esteem, insecure persons frequently feel the need to protect whatever esteem they have. Many become prideful. Pride can lead these to feel better about them self but they are not loving. Being prideful, can result in perceiving that problems are caused by others, you feel superior to most people, you lie to appear good to others, you don’t need to learn anything new….. In aggrandizing yourself, you may set false standards of righteous behavior or become unjustifiably critical of others. For example, you build yourself up by living ‘higher’ standards, such as, you don’t drink cola or watch t-v on Sunday, neither of which are forbidden. Then you can feel that you are better than those that do this. This is being judgmental and prideful which are serious sins!
And there are people who resist loving their neighbor. This is a major sin which must be overcome if you are to have your trespasses forgiven.
In the author’s experience, low self-esteem, insecure people have another challenge—they frequently are resistant to new ideas, new understandings of teachings, problems and doctrines. They thus can limit what they learn, they can be closed minded. It seems that such people need rigidity to protect their tender egos. We next consider how living the Two Great Commandments helps overcome all these problems.
How do we overcome being judgmental and prideful and build ego
The First Great Commandment is the key to overcoming: “Love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul and with all thy mind” (Matthew 22: 37). When you do this, you can feel His love-- then you can love yourself, and as this happens, you can love others, the Second Great Commandment. With this love:
- you are not easily offended and don’t distort the motives of other people;
- you have strength to forgive and want to forgive;
- you have the strength to perceive your own shortcomings and to repent;
- you can forgive yourself;
- you don’t ‘need’ to become prideful to protect your tender ego.
We overcome low esteem and insecurity by feeling the love of our Heavenly Father and Christ. We accomplish this by:
- by praying to feel His love;
- by living the Gospel—praying, reading the scriptures, living the Commandments, helping others, doing our duties, working to forgive……………
When we feel God’s deep love for us, we can love others.
Conclusion
To be forgiven of our sins, the Lord commands that we:
- repent of our sins;
- forgive those that have transgressed against us;
- and hopefully forgive yourself for the mistakes that you have made. This becomes easier when you realize that you have learned and grown in correcting your misdeeds.
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